In case you need encouragement today
/Read till the end for a special message.
How do you react when life throws you a curveball?
I don’t know if anyone handles this kind of thing well. When the rug gets pulled out from under me, the first reaction is usually not pretty. Here's my experience with it.
At the beginning of this year, I had a contract to write social media posts. From the beginning it was clear that I was going in a different direction from what the client had in mind. But I was open to criticism and wanted to grow my skills, so I stuck with it and adapted to what she asked me to do.
But it wasn’t working for my client, and she ended the contract. Even though I knew this was the right move, it stung. That was a steady paycheck plus quite a blow to my ego.
I cried. I blew off steam with my best friend and some margaritas. And when the immediate shock wore off, I had to actually deal with what happened.
And that aftermath isn’t pretty because there is no logic to feelings.
Sometimes I felt sad, angry or completely drained of energy. Often I was scared about money.
Maybe you can relate. A lot of us are feeling all the feelings since COVID struck the US in March. We’re having to deal with uncertainty with our health, our finances and economy, and a whole lot of fear about the future.
It’s a lot. No one trains us how to deal with this shit.
We have to learn on our own. And most of the time we learn how to do it by going through it. You’re allowed to feel like crap after you get hit by a metaphorical hurricane (or literal).
You don’t have to suck it up and put on a happy face. Even if you think that other people need you to be happy, I’m going to tell you it is more valuable for the people who love you to see that you’re hurting and struggling. Your kids need to know it’s ok to go through hard times and how to handle it in the best way you can. You loved ones want to show you support.
The best thing you can do is to let yourself feel whatever you’re feeling. Get plenty of rest, drink lots of water, and move your body in a way that feels good. Ask for help and accept it.
If you’re struggling right now, I want you to know that it is ok. You don’t have to have it all figured out. You don’t even have to feel good right now. You are ok to be exactly where you are, mess and all.
You’re allowed to feel the full range of feelings.
And if you struggle with some of the feelings I share here (hopelessness, sadness, anger, confusion, doubt - you know, all the ones we try to run from), I invite you to reach out to someone. Someone who can sit with you and listen without trying to fix your problem. This could be a loved one, a therapist, a pastor, or a coach.
You’re not alone, my friend.
And if you feel alone, you don’t have to.
Know that I have been there. Maybe I haven’t had the same exact experiences as you. Maybe I’ve walked a different path and had different experiences, but I know what those deep feelings feel like.
And if you need someone to sit with you, I’m here. Hit comment and let me know what you're going through.
If you need someone to give you permission, here it is: You are allowed to feel exactly what you’re feeling.