This is the time of year when we look at what has passed and what is yet to come. Do you have a system that you like to use?

A process of evaluation can be an important part of living and growing. Assessment is a way to look at what works and what doesn’t work so that you can be intentional about how you act in the future.

One of the most important parts of assessing is to do so with a curious mind, not a judgemental one. When you approach your past with curiosity, you’re acting like a journalist and looking at the story from all angles so you can understand. Looking at what actions were taken and what was the result from those actions. Find the thoughline of the story. And from that non-judgemental perspective, evaluating if those are the results you want to keep.

Most people don’t like to look at the past because they look at it with judgment. They carry shame that they should have been better or that things should have been different. But as the Ghost of Christmas Past says in A Christmas Carol, “the shadows of the past are what they are. Do not blame me.” Don’t blame yourself. You made the best choice you could at the time. And it’s in the past now. You can’t do anything to change that.

You can change your future, however. And the only way to do that is to evaluate and be honest.

I do a brief end of year ritual and I would like to share with you what my process is. I set aside about an hour of peace and quiet, but it usually doesn’t take that long. I make myself very cozy with soft blankets and a nice smelling candle. I want to let myself know this is part of my self care. I make three lists on three separate pieces of paper.

1. What do you want want to leave behind in 2022? Make a list of all the people, places, circumstances, thoughts, feelings, experiences, and situations that you do not want to come with you into new year energy. Purge it all from your brain and onto the paper.

2. Look at that list thoughtfully and with curiosity and ask what wisdom can be found from this crap? What self-knowledge did you gain? What was the contrast that you’re now aware of (less of that, more of this)? What do you now understand better than before?

3. Now that you know what you don’t want, it’s time to declare what you do want? This is also a great place to list what went well and what you want to continue. Make a list of your desires, dreams, preferences, wishes, and anything you want to commit to creating in the new year. I keep this handy all year long and like to reflect on it as I go along.

That’s it! That’s my simple process. Sometimes, I like to release the first list by burning it, if I have a safe way to do that. Otherwise, I will rip it to pieces and throw it away. I like to physically get rid of it and leave it beyond.

What’s yours? Feel free to hit reply and tell me what you do. Or if you try my process, let me know how it goes for you!

I’m wishing you the happiest of New Years and a 2023 full of your desires!